In the last few months I have thought a lot about how we define ourseles, the stories we carry around and the labels we wear. In my Friday mornining yoga philosophy group we are working throught the kleshas or the ways we cause our own suffering. The question this week is "what are the 'stickers' others have put on you and what stickers have you put on yourself?"
This is what I was laying up until midnight thinking about last night. The numerous labels that others had labelled me with that had stuck in my mind, in kindness and sometimes anger, the labels I had used to define myself. Those still in use and those I have let go of. As I realized how late it was I realized what this months mantra would be. So hum. In English it translates to "I am" or "I am that".
So I look at the stickers, labels and stories I have used to understand myself and my place in this world. What has changed? What have I let go of? Some are kind. Some are down right cruel, like a gut punch. Then in meditation I return to the mantra so hum. I am. I am the same stuff as the trees and birds out my window, I am the same star dust that formed our planet, I am the result of the big bang. I am profoundly unique while at the same time unfathomably insignificant. Both are a comfort.
Historically this mantra is to remind us of our connection to source and God. I am that which is created by Brahma. So on the inhale and hum on the exhale. It becomes a loop morphing into Ham Sa. I am one with the atman and I will return to it when this earthly form is complete. You can read Wikipedia's thoughts here. For me I prefer the idea that we are all stardust and the same atoms. Really to me it is the same thing. They don't feel mutually exclusive.
This is the singular label that we all share. I am that from which I came and to what I will return and that is the only truth in life (well, that and taxes as the saying goes). It is the label that unites us and levels all playing fields. We are all that. It is from here that we can understand a stranger, have compassion for the other. Be generous with a stranger. It is also our mantra for November. You can hear me chant it 108 times here.
I hope that tonight I slip quickly into sleep letting go of things people have labelled me as, or perhaps how I have seen myself at different points in my life. Remembering our universal label.
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